Happy weekend...

I'm looking forward to a few days of centering myself and cooking up some warming meals while the snow falls outside. Here are a few things that are currently floating around my brain space to take you into the weekend:

• Rediscovered The Pious Bird of Good Omen, the early Fleetwood Mac album, which grooved me toward the end of the week. Really dig the wildly sexy version of "Black Magic Woman." 
• Mesmerized by Yuri Ancarani's video of a Italian marble quarry boss, his gentle gestures and the enormity of it all.
• Reminded by this article of the value of lunchtime walks. We sit too much at work - period. Next week, let's all promise to get out of the office and give our brains a break. 
• And lastly, touched by this beautiful quote on the personal nature of forgiveness that has stuck with me over the past month, from the wonderful revived "Dear Sugar" podcasts on WBUR:

“The hard thing is that you have to do all the work. And the beautiful thing is that you get to do all the work.”

— Cheryl Strayed

Activated Charcoal

Moving to a new city has it's perks, but it also means inheriting a new set of very old pipes.

No matter where you live, there's a good chance that your water is a bit contaminated. In general, water treatment plants work to combat any local water pollutants, but do so by adding disinfectants like chlorine and similar chemicals. While most of our days are spent drinking filtered office water, I started to search for how to make our home tap water a more palatable experience too.

Water contamination has it's own risks, at varying levels and exposures, and every town is required to mail the local annual water quality report to its citizens. If you're looking to nerd out on what's hanging out in your most privileged resource, the Environmental Working Group has a great guide on how to read your local water report and also on how to choose a water filter accordingly.

At-home water filtration options are plentiful, but not all filters are created equally. There are also some very basic options available, and even the simplest technology that is used to purify water across the world is available for the home.

In our own recent hunt for water filtering, we've selected to try a more sustainable solution: charcoal. Activated charcoal is actually a relatively primitive filtration method, and it's a form of activated carbon, which is used in most modern water filters today. What's even more lovely about these sticks is that after you're done using them, they won't end up in a landfill somewhere for the next hundred years. Instead, you can give them a second life in your garden or use as a kitchen deodorizer .

The most readily available brands of charcoal are made of responsibly harvested Japanese oak, and are renowned for their ability to remove impurities, attract chemical compounds and impart alkalizing benefits in your water. Each stick lasts around four months, and using it is as simple as opening a reusable glass bottle and filling it with water. 

If you're interested in giving this type of water filtering a try, check out Kishu Charcoal and Morihata Binchotan Charcoal.

Soul Soothing Emotional Management

Emotions.

I've been thinking a lot lately about how important, yet difficult it is to manage them, particularly when the timing isn't right ... which is generally when they tend to hit. But really, when was the last time you felt a strong emotion and took the time to stop, step back, and try to understand where it was coming from?

On a day to day basis, this is easier said than done. But studies show that emotional intelligence is just as important as work ethic and IQ when it comes to being successful in work and life.  On the flip side, a steady diet of emotional distress can wreak havoc on your health, your resilience, and your focus.

“The emotional brain responds to an event more quickly than the thinking brain.”

— Daniel Goleman

Last year, I had the pleasure of attending a conference out west and hearing from The Energy Project, a firm that partners "with organizations to create workplaces that are healthier, happier, more focused and more purposeful." Part of our experience focused on discerning how adequately we each were currently meeting the four core needs they believe we all have in life: Physical, Spiritual, Mental and Emotional.

The Energy Project defines "emotional energy" as being "about learning to cultivate the specific emotions associated with high performance, because how people feel profoundly influences how they perform." In this light, if emotions affect the way we feel, and the way we feel affects the way we perform, then a good portion of our happiness lies within how well we can understand and manage emotions themselves.

People who mindfully manage their emotions tend to demonstrate self-awareness, motivation and empathy, which in turn can also help create a more balanced, and even longer, life. Compared to the alternative, that doesn't sound so bad. Below are a few key steps to take when your emotions hit the fan.

Quick Tips for Managing Emotions

Breathe. Next time you feel the urge to pour out your frustrations, instead try taking a few slow, deep breaths. Count to 3 as you inhale, and 6 as you exhale. Research shows that venting actually fuels your anger, rather than extinguishing it, as does quietly dwelling on your negative feelings.

Translate. Dr. Darlene Mininni, author of The Emotional Toolkit created the following formula to identify emotions: thoughts + body sensations = emotion. Once you've accepted the reality, bucket your emotion into one of the following categories - anxiety, sadness, anger and happiness - and identify how your thoughts and related physical reactions align. 

For example, if a deadline has you stressed, you might feel angry, causing your heart to race and your muscles to tighten. Pinpointing these details can help you ask yourself the right questions about what exactly you're feeling, and how it affects you, and better cope by moving forward.

Write, write, write. People who write, and re-write, have a better handle on their emotions, which can "lead to behavioral changes and improve happiness." Keeping a journal can also help you track emotions, take notice of patterns, and identify what habits or stimulants might be stirring your emotions.

Weekly Words: "Walking Home from Oak-Head"

There is something
about the snow-laden sky
in winter
in the late afternoon

that brings to the heart elation
and the lovely meaninglessness
of time.
Whenever I get home - whenever -

somebody loves me there.
Meanwhile
I stand in the same dark peace
as any pine tree,

or wander on slowly
like the still unhurried wind,
waiting,
as for a gift,

for the snow to begin
which it does
at first casually,
then, irrepressibly.

Wherever else I live -
in music, in words,
in the fires of the heart,
I abide just as deeply

in this nameless, indivisible place,
this world,
which is falling apart now,
which is white and wild,

which is faithful beyond all our expressions of faith,
our deepest prayers.
Don't worry, sooner or later I'll be home.
Red-cheeked from the roused wind,

I'll stand in the doorway
stamping my boots and slapping my hands,
my shoulders
covered with stars.

- Mary Oliver

Clearing the Air

I've always been amazed at the ability of smell to transport you to a different place and time.

Cut open a lemon, and I'm instantly taken back to the Aeolian Islands off of Sicily, where lemons the size of footballs grew outside the house. We'd climb the trees to retrieve them en masse, and brought them home where they sat in a fragrant mountain on the kitchen table, waiting to be squeezed over fish or grilled vegetables.

Freshly cut garden roses remind me of my grandmother, who was a devotee of those saintly flowers, and how they symbolized life and growth.

And, a bundle of lavender transports me home, where my mother bought the dried herb in bulk, stuffing them in simple muslin bags and tucking them in our drawers, closets and laundry baskets.

So, it should be of little surprise that one of my favorite ways to elevate mood is with scent.

In our home, we've been diffusing essential oils using a Stadler Form diffuser. Essential oils are amazingly effective at both purifying the air and delivering relaxing notes, and there are a few concoctions in particular that I love for clean and calming tones.

Cleaning Blend

10 drops eucalyptus essential oil

5 drops tea tree essential oil

3 drops lemon essential oil

2 drops sweet orange essential oil

Calming Blend

10 drops lavender essential oil

3 drops bergamot essential oil

For each blend, mix together in a dark glass bottle, keeping these proportions constant even if increased. When ready to use, fill your diffuser to the fill line with water, and add in 3-7 drops of the essential oil blend.

Spicy Turmeric-Honey Elixir

Throughout much of the winter, it's a battle to ward off sickness, particularly when stress levels are high and there are germs abound. Drinking more water and keeping clean hands only goes so far. And for this, I've discovered that turmeric is powdered gold.

How It Works

As our bodies age, they must work harder to balance both the stressors of every day life and healthy restorative rebuilding. Certain herbs and spices called adaptogens can help us respond to these continuously changing environments by normalizing our cells and aiding in the recovery process. Turmeric in particular helps boost the immune system due to it's high antioxidant and anti-inflammatory nature. It's also a great addition to boost skin health, though be careful if applying topically as it stains quite easily. 

How to Use It

Turmeric has a mild peppery taste and is fantastic as a cooking spice in many South Asian and Moroccan dishes. But for a quick remedy, I've been creating a simple paste that can be kept in a jar on the counter for an easy and warming drink.

Spicy Turmeric-Honey Elixir

1/4 cup raw honey

2 teaspoons ground turmeric

1/8 teaspoon cayenne powder

Freshly ground pepper

1/2 lemon

Place honey in a jar or cup. Mix in turmeric and cayenne to create a thick paste. If storing for future use, cover and keep at room temperature.

To serve, scoop a teaspoon into a mug and pour hot water over. Stir spoon until paste is evenly dissolved. Squeeze in 1/2 a lemon and top with plenty of freshly cracked black pepper.

Desert Vibes Only: Joshua Tree National Park

The sun was setting, and it was happening quickly.

It was an early November evening on the winter side of daylight savings time, and we had places to be. As we sped down Twentynine Palms Highway, the sky turned gold and shadows turned the sandy landscape to a dusty brown. A desert fox crossed our path. Two miles turned to five, and we cursed the LA traffic for making us so terribly late.

We had flown to California to ring in the dawn of my thirties. My only goal? To spend some time meditating on the close of a roller-coaster decade. What we got was five days of pure California sunshine and enough warm desert vibes to bring good juju for the next ten years of my life.

We finally did reach our destination that first night. When we arrived, it was at the intersection of an iridescent sunset and a full moon rising in the middle of the Joshua Tree National Park. And that's exactly where I found myself at the on the last day of my twenty-ninth year with the man I love and a brand new plan to build our lives together.

Joshua Tree National Park, and the surrounding Yucca Valley, are beautiful and arid. We spent several more days enjoying the vastness of the space, the warm Mojave Desert air and the sheer delicious silence about the place.

What to Do

Hike, hike, hike. And take the opportunity to simply get lost.

Joshua Tree is expansive and full of diverse hiking experiences. On our first day out, we hiked a few miles of the Boy Scout Trail, which leads hikers through typical flat dry terrain which is dotted with monzogranite boulders piled like mountains of clay throughout the trail. On our second day, we trekked up Ryan Mountain, which was quick, but challenging, due to the harsh mid-day rays and dry heat. The views at the top were jaw-dropping, and on a clear day you can see straight through to Mount San Jacinto.

The Integratron

If you've ever wondered what it's like to get your brain tickled, this is exactly what an afternoon at The Integratron in Landers, CA feels like. North of Yucca Valley, in the middle of Landers, the street names are as celestial as the landscape. The Integratron was built in the 1950s through a combination of Boeing-engineered design and alien technology (you read that right). Today, the acoustically perfect dome is home to daily "sound baths," where visitors can transcend space and time while being serenaded by the vibrational sounds of quartz-crystal singing bowls. After an hour long aural massage, we stumbled out into the sunlight rejuvenated, invigorated and awesomely elevated.

Noah Purifoy's Outdoor Desert Art Museum

Back in Joshua Tree, we visited artist Noah Purifoy's homage to assemblage art and desert sculpture. Purifoy's art is political, cheeky, and when placed in the middle of a desert landscape, even more striking than expected. It's a sanctuary of sorts, quiet and reflective, which is exactly what I think Purifoy intended it to be.

Where to Eat

Pie for the People: On our first night in the desert, we had news to celebrate, so we picked up a bottle of bubbly and a pizza in town and brought it back to our rental house. Pie For the People is a New York-style pizza joint slash yoga studio (as you do, California) and it serves up  delicious and unique pies in the middle of the desert.

Pappy & Harriet's Pioneertown Palace: Weekly nightlife is limited in Joshua Tree, but Pappy & Harriet's is always rocking out. We grabbed a plate of BBQ and margaritas and grooved along to sassy siren Dominique Pruitt's tunes as the stars shone above the valley.

Where to Stay

Joshua Tree is a fantastic place to camp, but, given that we were celebrating, we opted for a rental home.

Yucca Valley and the towns surrounding the park are chocked full of thoughtfully designed homes to rent, so check out AirBnB, HomeAway and VRBO. We hit the jackpot with the Joshua Tree GreenHaus, due to its private nature, modern architecture and a pretty luxurious hot tub out back. It was the perfect space for meditation and celebration alike.

Our time in Joshua Tree was sacred, both for the relaxation we experienced and the monumental milestones we celebrated there in the stories of life and love. I look forward to returning someday, not only to relive the memories, but to immerse myself in those good desert vibes.